I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me.

I orginally planned to write this epic blog entry last night after certain happenings however as soon as I made it back to layton from Elyse's all I could think about was how absolutely inviting my bed looked.

So here I am. "The Morning After" if you will... Last night was interesting. I met with Brother Poll which may have been a new development to my religious efforts. I was very curious and nervous as to what would be said in the meeting. The first part was you're average introduction. "Hi...where are you from again? ohh Oregon, I hear it's beautiful this time of year.....mhm...Layton now? Quaint town I lived there a couple years...." Etc. About an hour and half and three gallons of tears later this man who knows me only by my abrupt time-shorted life story is telling me there is something greater than him and I, something much greater, that loves and cares for me. I agree with him in the fact I don't think our meeting together was by chance at all. Maybe who ever the greater power is brings certain people into your life so you can learn and teach and grow closer to whomever he might be. Patience. I have been so angry at myself and the powers to be that I have not been shown the truth. I know better now that I need to be patient. I can't rush God. I have to pay attention to the unanswered prayers as well as the answered. I have to open my eyes and heart a whole lot more to whats happening around me. I learned a lot from our little sit down, and I hope I can keep it fresh in my mind. I really admire all of these people around me, but I still feel outcasts however, I know they are not the ones exclude me, its myself.

Elyse said an interesting thing to me last night on the way home from class. "Screw Brad." Which literally speaking would not be a problem. Okay, okay that wasn't funny. "No seriously Screw brad, screw everyone else just think about you." Simple right? It should be. It sounds easy enough. Allowing ones self to be well, selfish. What do I really want? Me? What am I looking for? What would make me happy? I really need to focus in on these questions aswell. I am being very influenced by the people around me, with good reason. I love them all and they mean the world to me. Though, I need to worry about Christine too. I'm not really sure what Christine wants other than solid answers. Which are obviously not going to happen. I'm not exactly sure why Christine thinks that she has to figure out the world right now. She is very impatient and very stubborn which is an ugly combination when looking for faith. Christine just needs a little time, I think. And she also needs to acknowledge the people around her. Like her bestfriend who is helping a lot more than she realizes. Signing her up for a doctrine class, talking to her depressed ass on long days, laughing with her when she really needs it, and most of all just there. Christine needs to stop refering to herself in 3rd person now, and she needs to go to work.