enormity

I'm getting sick. It's traumatic. But don't fear yet, I will be well soon and whenever that is I hope that, which is my literary tree will provide bountiful fruit.

I'm really tired of living in limbo age. The gap between being a twenty-something and being the sweet, naive teenager who thinks she has the world figured out.

I'm not exactly sure if this is a depression I feel myself falling into or if it is a side effect of illness. Either way my brain is working overtime thinking about the misery of life and reviewing years gone by. I think everyonce in a while I go through this period of desolation. I'm quite bored of it, really.

I've also been around a lot of stupid people. Not people close to me. People I pass on the streets going about their everyday lives. Coming in and out of my workplaces. And since this has happened I have been thinking about the fine line between genius and insanity. Also the differences of a stupid person thinking the world is great and beautiful, and a very intellectual, educated person realizes this world is on a downfall. That all of us are slowly wasting away, killing our planet and each other.

So my question to you is, would you rather be ignorant and happy or intelligent and miserable?

I really don't know how to answer that for myself. I'm not the smartest nor the dumbest. I'm centered, but the enormity of the world and what is happening depresses me enough to consider ending my relationship with non-ficton books.